更新时间:2025-08-07 14:28:35
failure
whyaresomanypeopleafraidoffailure?quitesimplybecausenoonetellsushowtoleadfailureexperiencetogrowth.weforgetthatfailureispartoflifeandthateverypersonhastherighttofail.
mostparentsworkhardateitherpreventingfailureorprotectingtheirchildrenfromit.onewayistolowerstandards.amotherdescribesherchildshurriedly-madetableas"perfect!"eventhoughitcouldntstandonunevenlegs.anotherwayistoshiftblame.ifjohnfailstheexam,histeacherisunfairorstupid.
thetroublewithfailure-preventionmethodsisthattheyleaveachildunequippedforlifeintherealworld.theyoungneedtolearnthatnoonecanbebestateverything,noonecanwinallthetime itspossibletoenjoyagameevenwhenyoudontwin.achildwhosnotinvitedtoabirthday
partyorenrolledinthebaseballteamfeelsterrible,ofcourse.butparentsshouldnotofferaquickcomfortprizeorsay,"itdoesntmatter"becauseitdoes.theyoungshouldexperiencedisappointment andmasterit.
failureisneverpleasurable.ithurtsgrown-upsandchildrenexactlyalike.butitcanmakeapositivecontributiontoyourlifeonceyoulearntouseit.steponeistoask,"whydidifail?"controlthenaturalimpulsetoblamesomeoneelse.askyourselfwhatyoudidwrong,howtoimprove.ifsomeoneelsecanhelp,dontbeshyaboutaskingthem.
失败
为什么那么多人都害怕失败?原因很简单:没人告诉我们该如何让失败的经历促进成长。我们忘记了,失败是人生的一部分,每个人都有失败的权利。
很多家长竭尽全力阻止失败或保护自己的孩子免受失败。一方面,他们降低了要求。孩子匆匆忙忙做的小桌子,即使桌腿都不平,妈妈也会夸奖说“太棒了!”。另一方面,他们把过错转嫁给别人。如果约翰考试不及格,那么他的老师一定是不公平的或愚蠢的。
这些避免失败的措施有很大的弊端,他们会使孩子对真实世界里的生活毫无准备。年轻人需要学会,没有人会处处领先,时时成功—即使失败了,也同样能够从游戏中获得乐趣。 当然,没被邀请参加生日晚会,或是落选棒球队,都会让孩子感到非常失落。但父母也不用马上就跑来安慰或着说“没关系”之类的话,因为这的确有关系。年轻人应该体验失望一—并控制这种情绪。
失败从来不是一件快乐的事情。无论是对成人还是对孩子,它都会造成伤害。不过,一旦你学会了该如何利用它,失败就会对你的人生产生积极的作用。第一步,就是问
问自己:“我为什么会失败?”控制那种自然而然就去指责别人的冲动。问问自己,究竟哪里做错了,该如何改进。如果有人能够帮助你,别对请教他们感到不好意思。
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